• 28Jun
    Categories: Uncategorized Comments: 5

    my husband & my nephew

    Would this picture lead you to believe that something is wrong? Take a look at this article, then look at this picture again. Worried?

    According to the Stop It Now campaign, you should be worried. I understand that there is a problem with s*xual abuse in our society and it needs to be stopped. But I do have problems with an organization placing billboards of an adult holding a child’s hand and saying that something must be wrong with that picture. The actual caption below the picture reads, “It doesn’t feel right when I see them together.” On the Stop It Now website, there is a picture of a woman hugging a child with the caption “Stop it now!” above the picture and, “Together we can prevent the s*xual abuse of children,” below the picture.

    How, exactly, do they expect for parents to show their children love and affection if they cannot hug them? How can they keep track of them in a crowd without holding their hand? Should they not hold hands when they pray together as a family, because they might promote an image of abuse? If you think these ideas are far fetched, just think about discipline for a moment. There was a time when spanking was not uncommon or thought of as abuse. Then there were child abuse awareness campaigns that promoted the idea that any physical punishment of a child must be abuse. Now, parents dare not implement corporal punishment of their children, especially in public, because of insinuations of abuse. Will this particular campaign have negative ramifications when it comes to expressing love toward children? Will it spur us to become so paranoid that we take a hands-off approach toward children and that all physical affection becomes suspect in the way that all physical discipline has? I hope not.

    The picture posted above is of my husband and my nephew during a family outing. For the record, my husband is fantastic with children. My nephew is always excited and happy to see his uncle. I think it is a beautiful representation of a healthy relationship and trust. But in our world today, would this picture lead someone to suspect something is wrong?

    It is sad how some people can take something so beautiful and tarnish it. Meanwhile among adults and teens promiscuity is rampant. Maybe if s*xuality was not so prominent in our culture these deviant behaviors would not be so prevalent either.

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5 Comments to Affection vs. Abuse

  • Hi Heather – thank you for speaking out against that horrible and grossly misleading campaign. I am a divorced, Christian father who spent 17 years fighting the court system just to be able to see my daughter. When I see fatherhood portrayed in this light, I WILL rise to the occasion. I hope you will do as I have encouraged others to do – Call Rebecca Odor at the Virginia Dept. of Health 804-864-7740 and Maxine Stein, the executive director of stopitnow.org – and complain loudly. I spoke to both – nice ladies, but they need to hear the voices of the concerned. Thanks again!
    DN

  • How absurd! It’s sad how many people jump to conclusions on a first glimps at people….it’s not right to judge by first impressions, and this is just opening so many doors for lawsuits and heartache for a bunch of innocent people…Next thing we know, they’ll think we’re stalking someone if we so much as hold their gaze for a few seconds!
    Thank you so much for posting about it…I think people need to see this side of it as much as possible!

  • I agree with you but how else do you portray it? You can’t use ugly hateful mean looking people because that doesn’t happen to be true either. And yes, a predator could just hold hands with a child and walk away. I think the intent behind the warnings is appropriate but the images may not be so much. Beverly

  • Thank you for the comments. I appreciate your different perspectives. I truly believe we do have a problem with adults preying on children. Parents need to be aware of who is involved in their child’s life, and supervise interactions as much as possible. In today’s busy on-the-go world, this can be very hard. Children are often left with daycare providers, babysitters, and other family members. When they are older they may go to friends’ houses or be dropped off for sports practice or other after school activities, so this can be difficult. Parents need to teach their children about privacy and modesty…and that no one is to touch them in an inappropriate way. I think active parental involvement can help prevent some of the cases of abuse. I think that predators should be reported and prosecuted. I just dislike the portrayal in these ads that might make people view healthy affectionate behavior with suspicion.

  • I think the picture in the website was a portrayal of the mother protecting her child and keeping him safe, not molesting him. Also, my father molested me and my siblings for years, it is quite prevalent in our society. People never questioned my fathers affections towards me, someone should have – a persons intervention could have saved me the experience of fighting my fathers attempts to rape me when I was 15.

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